This post is part of a weekly series of ‘link-up’ Posts which reflect on life’s journey, old memories and family stories (see below for more info).
I had been a tiny bit of a disaster when it came to lasting relationships, and I suspect a major disappointment to my parents for most of my adult life (although much kudos to them for tightening the bite on their lips and never actually revealing the depth of their disappointment to my face), until I became pregnant.
With hindsight, this may have been the biggest disappointment of all, since I was not married and was already 32 years old. Both factors probably seemed wildly ‘modern’ to my amazing but together-for-50-years-from-the-age-of-17 parents.
Although the pregnancy wasn’t planned, and I had only been with my partner for a relatively short period of time, I had absolute clarity about the way forward. I considered that, at the ripe old age of 32, that this may be my only chance to hold my own infant in my arms as a mother (poetic really, since I eventually ended up giving birth for the last time at the age of 40), so, bravely, thought I, with or without a man, I would tackle this situation with an open heart and a suit of metaphorical armour.
I swelled to the size of Violet Beauregard in Willy Wonka’s chocolate factory, and wondered whether I would also turn blue. My fantasy of sailing through pregnancy (like one of those super-pert skinnies, soliciting exclaims of surprise as I turn to reveal my neat baby bump which is invisible from other angles), failed to hold muster, so I gave in to the inflation.
My baby boy is a Millennium kid. He arrived late one evening, far too quickly even for the midwife, who was relaxing into a steady stream of routines when I started to push before we had reached the delivery room. He arrived,wanting to do that which he has been excelling at ever since…..sleep. I watched him from my hospital bed all night, unable to sleep for fear that he may not really be mine, and unsure what to do or how to do it.
We quickly learned. I fed him and he grew. He cooed and I kissed. He messed and I cleaned. The same routine which still basically prevails to this day, but without the Pampers.
It is a time which can never be forgotten. Not for the pain or for the sleeplessness. Not for the worry or for the endless dieting and sore nipples. It is the bottomless bank of love which is somehow born at the same moment as your child which can never be explained. It is the fact that the joy and pride of parenting only grows as they grow. No matter how big, how old, or how unkissable he becomes, I am a mother and he is mine.
My partner and I managed a semi-happy 7 years before mothering and fathering became two separate phenomena. My boy is amazing, well-adjusted, and frankly gorgeous, so I think we did a good job to date. I hope to be around long enough to coo, kiss, feed (but not clean) for him for many more years yet.
I am dying to hear your own stories and memories about becoming a parent.
Post an entry to your own Blog and use the Linky tool (link below) to enter your memories into the fray. If you like, just leave a comment and join in that way, but do join in.
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If you feel sexy, grab the code too (just follow the link) and post it into your Blog entry – that way, everyone can pay it forward as they say – it’s good to share.
Please visit the other blogs on the list and leave a comment or two – it makes everyone’s day!
In next week’s Linky we will take a look back at the memory of your first holiday without your parents! How old were you? Was it a trip with school friends and their families, or maybe a new boyfriend was on the scene? Did you venture abroad for the first time, perhaps? I am dying to hear your stories, so please come back and take part!!
No rules, just take the theme and write, then come back and join in with the Blog Hop on Tuesday…
Other posts in this series:-
Week 1 - My earliest baby photo
Week 2 - Old School Portrait
Week 3 - Earliest Writings
Week 4 - Bestest Friends
Week 5 - Teenage Crushes
Week 6 - First Movie Memories
Week 7 - The Song You Snogged Your Hand To
Week 8 - Homage to Grandparents
Week 10 - Tying the Knot (again)
Week 11 - Blue: Girl Guide Uniform Shambles
Week 12 - Cuddly Companions
Week 13 - A Rope, Some Pals and Jelly on a Plate
Week 14 - Pink NHS Specs, 1975
Week 16 - The Lo-Tech Times of Childhood
Week 17 – Rollermania!
Week 18 – Old Teen Magazines